May 24, 2004

• I am so braindead.                                                              

  
  

  I mean, look at me.  Well, you can't since I'm at my computer and you hopefully aren't.  Unless you're some freaky stalker person that is eyeing my every move with your double lensed binoculars right now.  But in  most cases, you're by your own computer.....in most cases.

  
  

  Anyway, something is defintely wrong.  First off, i have chosen to not write in this thing for about four days now.  For absolutely no reason.  None.  I just can't think.  Well, at least not about one subject for five consecutive seconds.  Two seconds ago i was thinking about the Atkins diet.  Right now i am eating a roll of bread. Screw the bread, i want a Fruit Rollup.  Ugh, I'm full...time for some reading.  And all that took place in the course of less than ten seconds.  And I'm not even reading anymore.  The book was too boring.  And it was about the OC.  All about my favorite show ever.

  
  

  Something is definately wrong here. 

  
  

  Maybe it's because I started studying.  Like full-throttle studying.  That's one of the plusses to this whole braindead thing.  Once i hit the books, i just keep reading and reading because so what?  I'm bored with everything else.  I might as well get good grades. 

  
  

  I sort of feel like I'm exchanging my creativity/personality for good marks in school.  I guess for some people that would be a good thing. But for people like me?  People that spend more time analyzing life than taking part in it?  People that write down random short stories for fun?  People that have thier own imaginary world that is inhabited by magical creatures?  We might as well sell our souls to the devil.

  
  

  Even though it may sound like it, I'm not trying to say that grades are the 'devil'.  They aren't. Neither is education.  But sometimes people get the two mixed up.  Grades have boundaries.  Education doesn't.  Sure, we can control our grades to a certain extent, but no matter what grade we get, it is guarunteed to be between the A - F or + and - range.  Or whatever the grading scale is.  No matter what, it will be good, bad, average, or anywhere in between.  Education can be for anything.  If it exists, you can learn about it.  How many planets are in our solar system?  Why is the sky blue?  89% +8794.3432 = what? When did Abe Lincoln die? Why do all superheroes wear spandex? If you can put a question mark next to it, you can learn more about it.  You may not always find all the answers, but they are always out there somewhere.  And that, my friend, is what education is.  It's not about the grades.  It's about what you learn. 

  
  

  Wow, was that just me, or was it Mr. Cahil?

  
  

  But seriously.  Most students don't even care about what they're learning. All they really care about is whether they got an A in this or a B+ in that.  So most of the stuff we learn in school will eventually be forgotten.  But our grades won't.  Therefore, we're taught about stupid, useless things such as sponges and algebra. And then we're graded on how much we know about them. And that determines a huge part of our future.  So you don't know anything about the evolution of a wallabee? Hello community college. 

  
  

   I guess, in a way, we have to care about our grades a lot more than we should.  Morally, it is a waste of time.  However, we have to just accept this system.  That has always been my problem.  I thought grades were stupid so i didn't ever try. Instead, I was trying to rebel from the system that would help determine my future.  Which was, basically, down right stupid.  I didn't realize that our lives are built around society.  Growing up isn't about rebeling from it and making  a difference in your own unique way.  It's about contributing to that society no matter how stupid it may seem to you.  It's about accepting that society. 

  
  

  I have always been the type of person that would take the recipe for baking a cake, read the ingredients, mutter 'screw this', and make up my own thing.  Flour? Who needs flower? I've got..what's that say on the label?  I've got anthrax!  That should add a kick to it.  And of course I thought i was being ever so one-of-a-kind.  I was.  Just not in a positive way.  When you're baking a cake, follow the instructions.  And if you really know what you're doing, if you truly do, add something of your own.  And when its done baking, do whatever you want with the icing.  But as they say..you made the bed, and now you have to sleep in it.  You've made the cake, and now you have to eat it.  The path we create for ourselves will always effect us in the long run.  And sometimes we should read the warning signs along the way.  But, if you happen to be like me, please inform me on what that anthrax tastes like in your cake.  Was it a good thing to add?  Or damn, should you have stuck with the flour? 

  
  

  Okay..so maybe i can stay on one topic for a little more than five seconds. 

  
  

  adios, d

  
  

   

  • 6:49 pm
  • 8 Comments